1. Be a Better…Dresser.

    About a month ago, I was pissing and moaning about how I didn’t go to Coachella, and blah blah blah. Then comes the torture of perusing all the “Top Ten Best Looks at Cochella” blog posts that make me want to hang myself with a sueded-fringy bag’s strap. Soon after, I swore to bestie Becky that I would bring my own Coachella to NYC via flower head piece. This may or may not have also been inspired by pro-drudgery musician Lana Del Rey who I hate/love the shit out of.  

    So about a week ago…I crafted. A lot.

    I was gonna make like…1-2 head pieces. I think total I created 8 looks…and my fingers felt like I had played guitar like Hendrix for two hours. Worth it. 

    Here’s What To Do:

    Step 1: Buy crafty crap. I did it in one foul swoop at the flower market, but I am sure if you live in a suburb you can head over to your local Michael’s/Joanne’s/or another store with the first name of a person. Here’s the shopping list:

    • Bark-Covered Wire
    • Floral Tape
    • Paper Flowers with wire base

    Step 2: Measure your big head. OK…maybe I just have a big head, but take your bark-covered wire and measure it around the crown of your head, where you want your headband to sit. Now add 2 inches. 

    Step 3: Twist ends to form a circle. Why did I make you add 2 inches? So you have extra room for twisting, dummy. Twist the ends together and then wrap with a 6 inch length of floral tape, around the twisted part so you don’t pierce your head on accident. 

    Step 4: Wire on your flowers. Twist the wire part of the flower base around your circular crown in a random assortment. I suggest switching up direction and distance, so you don’t end up looking like a tacky flower girl. 

    Step 5: Cover your mess. After all the flowers are attached, wrap floral wire around the portions that you can visablly see the wrapped wire. It’s weird stuff and sticks to itself…I was amazed for way too long at this. 

    Tips to Sporting Your Flower Crown:

    • Do not wear to a business casual work environment. You’ll probably get fired.
    • Wear it with your hair down. If you match this with a bun…you might look like you work at the local renaissance fair or you may be mistaken for 
    • When you are making this, remember that you are a normal person, not a famous person, or a model. So no, you can’t pull off a Carrie/Bird in the Hair Moment when you are just on your way to get a bagel. Tone it down ladycat.
    • Keep it simple…too many colors, textures, and shapes are just going to make you  look like you work down at the Tropicana with Ricky Ricardo. 
    • Try to use as many natural materials as possible…plastic flowers and satin ribbon can go tacky tacky tacky REAL quick. Think Sienna Miller not Selena. (RIP) 

    Send me photos of your flower crowns!!!!!

    xo Chinae